LIFE COACH TONY PALERMO
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Events
    • Future Events
    • Past Events
  • Testimonial
  • Work with Tony
    • Personal coaching
    • Business Coaching
  • Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life
  • Join my email list
  • Contact

Blog

Dealing with Difficult People

12/6/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
One of the best skills you will ever learn in your life is how to deal with difficult people, not just in the workplace, but in any environment. Inevitably, situations will arise in which you will need to be well-equipped in interacting with people who are unnecessarily unfriendly, rude, or simply do not want to cooperate. Learning how to handle people like that is an important aspect of teamwork and knowing how to deal with someone who is difficult and uncooperative will come handy in many different circumstances. It is important to learn about conflict-resolution and gain the courage to know what to do when someone is being unjust or unreasonably difficult. This will help not just you personally and as an employee, but those around you, and the workplace environment as well.
 
There are different ways in which a person can be challenging. Someone who is difficult might be a generally tough person to deal with, and this can be something that your co-workers recognize or experience as well. This situation can be easier to deal with, since it can be comforting and helpful to know that you are not alone in approaching the person and addressing the issues that may exist because of their temperament or behavior. You may want to discuss the issue with your co-workers or boss and seek their help in addressing any problems that are occurring in the workplace due to the difficult individual. Create a plan of approach that allows the other person to also speak their concerns and work alongside you to create a better work environment.
 
Conversely, a difficult person may also affect you personally, and single you out in a manner that is quite similar to bullying. In these situations, it can be hard to stand up for yourself and speak out, particularly if these interactions are not evident or do not occur in front of others. It is very important that you recognize your right to speak up for yourself, and to address the issue individually or with the help of another co-worker or boss as a mediator if necessary. It is best that you address the issue when it comes up, rather than ignoring it and letting your discomfort or anger simmer. Ignoring the problem might lead to more difficulties. If the issue you are having with a co-worker is one in which you may be able to resolve between yourselves, the best thing to do is to take them aside and communicate your concerns with a good and friendly attitude. Be open to addressing mistakes on your part. Be prepared to set aside your emotions and to be reasonable, giving the other person the time to explain their side of the situation too.
 
Dealing with difficult bosses or managers can be more difficult, since they tend to have more authority over you and thus it is more distressful to approach them and discuss any issues you may be dealing with. Like your co-workers, you must approach them with reason and be prepared to hold your ground in addressing any problems. Communication is a necessary part of solving conflicts, and this goes for co-workers, bosses, or anyone.
 
Never forget that you have a big role in creating and maintaining meaningful and cooperative relationships at work. Approaching your job and co-workers with a positive and uplifting attitude can have a great impact not just on yourself and the work you do, but on the others as well. The situations you may deal with, and your reactions to them, can have a great impact on whether the conflict worsens or gets better. Sometimes, with your friendliness and willingness to adapt, you can even help to resolve difficulties without ever having to confront the other person at all.
 
These difficult people and conflicts can arise in any environment, even outside of work. It is very important to learn how to deal with problems that arise, and there are many ways that you can better prepare and equip yourself to do so. In the end, it is best to remember that sometimes people can be difficult, and it is not your fault, or your responsibility to change them. If the situation or person becomes too arduous to handle, always know that leaving your current employment for a better workplace environment is always an option, too.

0 Comments

Manifestation

10/5/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
Manifestation may seem like a new and mainstream idea, but it is something that has been around for quite a long time. As the world turns to meditation, positive change, and affirmations, manifestation too has become a topic more and more people seek to understand and explore.
 
What is “manifestation”?


Manifestation can be defined as turning your dreams into reality. By definition, “manifest” means to “make clear, to appear.” Through manifestation you can basically make that which you want “appear,” as it were – although may be simplifying it a little.

The idea is that if you really want something and put your mind and thought – and thereby, work – towards it, you will be able to attain almost anything that you want. Obviously, this is dependent too on the physical and natural laws of the universe (so you can’t manifest something impossible like a helicopter appearing in your backyard five minutes from now), but as long as it is realistic, it is possible.

Does manifesting really work?
 
Manifestation may seem like a simple trick at first. Maybe that’s why it seems so impossible to many – because it really doesn’t seem that hard from the outside. The problem lies not necessarily in the steps, however, or the process in which you try to manifest what you want. The biggest part of manifesting anything is having the deep, complete believe that you want and deserve that which you are manifesting. This means that if you don’t actually believe that you want what you are seeking, or think that you are unworthy of that which you are trying to manifest, the likelihood of it working lowers significantly. You have to be convinced that this is what you deserve, what you want, from the bottom of your heart and soul.

The only thing stopping you is yourself.

So, how can I manifest something in my life?
 
Manifestation can be summed up into five simple stages: choosing a realistic goal, letting go of doubt, focusing your attention towards your goal, working towards it, and feeling gratitude.
How To Manifest What You Want
One: Be specific and realistic
 
When trying to manifest something, anything goes – well, almost. There are some things that are simply physically and realistically not possible. Trying to manifest something that you don’t really believe can happen won’t work, because you can’t fool yourself into believing something that is literally impossible. You must choose something that you know can and will happen. Once you have decided what you want to manifest, make your intention clear and specific – answer basic questions like who, what, when, where, and why?
 
Two: Let go of doubts and obstacles
 
The biggest block to manifestation is doubt. As long as you don’t realize and trust in your heart that you will be able to manifest that which you want, it probably won’t work. Part of this process may even include getting rid of people or things that cause you doubt or hold you back. Once you let go of hesitation and trust the process, you will be one step closer to successful manifestation.
 
Three: Focus on what you are trying to manifest
 
After setting your intention, it is helpful to visualize what it would feel like to receive what you’re trying to manifest. This is similar to step one, except you imagine it. Close your eyes. Where are you? Who are you with? What is happening? Most importantly, how do you feel? The first emotion that you most likely experience is gratitude. Focus on that feeling – it’ll be useful for step five, too.
 
Four: Work towards that goal
 
Nothing works unless you do. The result of taking the previous steps is that, more than likely, you will subconsciously already be doing this. If you’re putting all your attention towards something, then you’re also thinking about ways to achieve it or what decisions to make that’ll take you closer to it.
 
Five: Feel gratitude and appreciation
 
This is the most important step. As was mentioned in the second step, you have to focus on the feeling of gratitude and appreciation that you would feel if you had already received it. That is, even though you haven’t reached your goal yet, you must continue to feel appreciation for what you do have, and what you believe you should and will have.
 
Manifestation can seem almost too good to be true. However, if you follow these steps and have faith in its success, you too will be able to manifest anything you want! No one said it better than Napoleon Hill: “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.”
0 Comments

Relationships

9/16/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
In a partnership, it is not always easy to get along smoothly. Occasional arguments and malicious words are quickly uttered and can hurt. Sometimes thinking back and remembering a time together is an excellent option to avoid stress. Even people who have a long and happy relationship cannot do without arguments. We have collected ten statements from different life partners for you.

Lovers, relationships, and flirtations are all kindled by our love fire. Often you know after a few seconds whether someone is sympathetic or not. You also talk about whether you can smell someone good. This is due to hormones that our body deliberately releases to please a specific person. Our collection is a highly complex network of muscles, feelings, receptors, and our own will. This is precisely what makes us like a person. This text is about people who love each other like mad and sometimes can't stand each other.

1. Satisfaction is the basis of a healthy relationship

"I think a happy relationship depends on a great many factors. From my time of view, a lot has to do with satisfaction. Because if you are satisfied, you can also have a happy relationship. To be happy together, you need trust, fun, spontaneity, and just willingness. That also means compromising and not being resentful. Each of the two partners should approach the other and listen, even if it is sometimes tricky. However, it is crucial to try out something new and do joint ventures.

Vacation together, fun and mutual annoyance, and teasing can breathe new life into such a relationship. So, jerk and tickle each other on the couch or be a little childish. I'm happy when we do something together, even if it's just washing the car. The main thing is that I'm on the road with my partner. "
Mother of one, 35 years old from Texas.

2. Tolerance, love, and respect as pillars of the partnership

"Above all, it is love and the willingness to be tolerant. To know where your weaknesses lie and also the ability to express your own needs fairly. In my opinion, humor, a large portion of the trust, and the knowledge that you are the only one are essential. When you know that, you feel that you are being taken seriously.

There are a thousand little things that have an impact. You want to feel taken seriously and, above all, to be respected. After an argument, it is important to me that you can forgive and give each other space to think. Even after a case, one should be ready for a serious conversation and not be selfish. Besides, resolved issues should not be rehashed after three or four weeks. That only creates arguments and resentment.

I think you should - even if it's difficult - put your vanity back a little and communicate for it. That is very important: communication! But in the end, every relationship is very individual, and everyone finds their way. I think there is no universal recipe and no model solution. We are not all the same. However, shared goals and interests should be the basis of a healthy relationship. "
Mother of three from Chicago, IL, 51, divorced once and happily married.

3. Tension and surprises keep a relationship going

"In my opinion, it is essential to share standard views so that you know how to deal with each other in any situation! But the central focus for me is joy, trust, and of course, loves because you should never forget what you love about your partner!

Even if you are together for a more extended period, you should still have fun together; do lots of activities and never let "everyday life" return. Because then there is no tension and surprises in a relationship. In a dispute, it is essential that at least one of the two partners can approach the other. This creates a common path again. Even when you quarrel, you know inside how the situation is hurting. Of course, it is best not to argue in the first place, but that is, of course, difficult or impossible. In the end, you should hug each other again and again and makeup! "
A journalist from Florida, 34, in a relationship for almost 14 years

4. Trust is the most fundamental element in a relationship

For me, mutual trust comes first. Sometimes you should forgive mistakes and not take everything so crookedly! This is very important. After an argument, you should also learn to forgive and accept an apology more quickly. A clarifying conversation afterward can only help to express yourself. "
College student from University of Michigan, 18, in a relationship for over three years
Picture
5. Independence strengthens the relationship
"I think my relationship has lasted for over six years because my partner and I both have obligations and don't always sit on top of each other. Everyone has their everyday tasks to do, and so you are all the happier when you can end the evening together on the couch.

I think it is essential to put yourself in your partner's shoes and understand how they feel. Seldom you say things that you don't mean. But the spoken words hurt the partner. Then you shouldn't be stubborn and want to get your way, but should see the situation a little more loosely. The sooner they both find peace again. "
Mother of one, 29 years old from California.

6. A long relationship is based on honesty

"I conclude that a good relationship is based on trust and honesty. Without that, the association is just challenging to lead. You should swim in the same wave and be able to express your opinion.

I believe my relationship is still going because I have patience, and my sense of humor brings absolute ease into the contact. But I can also approach severe things with the appropriate sharpness. "
A student from the Harvard University, 26, in a relationship for over six years

7. Growing together and forgiving mistakes for a happy relationship

"A good relationship looks very different from person to person. Some have a happy relationship while giving themselves all the freedom. The other cannot let go of each other and feel satisfied in this way.

With my boyfriend and me, we have known each other for a long time and have become "more mature" together. We tell each other everything. Regardless of whether the other person likes it or not - everything is said. The most important thing is honesty. This creates trust - which is also the be-all and end-all. It is also essential to be able to have fun together. And as long as the conversation topics do not run out, you can have a long and happy relationship. That describes us best. It depends on which argument it was and how long you haven't had to deal with each other. If you have been betrayed and you still love, see if you can build trust again.

Of course, it also depends on whether the partner does not make the same mistake again. When it comes to minor disputes, you can always talk about anything. Provided, they both want a relationship. This is best to look for a compromise and not be a stubborn head - then everything can be beautiful again! "
Blogger from the South Daytona, 24, in a relationship for four years

8. Good relationships are based on honest communication

"The scales should always be balanced. There must be no egoism but the interlocking of giving and take. Mutual attention is also significant. And the feminine and masculine energies should also be heeded. Care must be taken that they do not shift these days."
Media workers from the Dallas Texas, 29, in a relationship for several years

9. Soulmates have the best common ground

"I understand that there is a "soul mate" for every human being who fits the other person precisely and that one is somehow meant for one another. But the most important thing for a relationship is that you have a common ground. You have to have the same ideas, dreams, or goals as your partner. This is the only way to lead a life together.

How do you want to shape your future together or raise children when you have entirely different views? In my opinion, two people who fundamentally disagree cannot have a relationship. Sooner or later, it breaks. This basis is just right with us.

Especially in very long relationships, you should reflect on what you have already experienced together and recalled the beautiful moments, even when everything looks gray and gloomy. Often you already know deep in your heart that you don't want to throw it all away just because you argued a little (harder).

Objective opinions from outside people can also help you think about your perspective and what you might have done wrong yourself. And after that, you should talk to each other and get rid of the matter. A serious apology or a small gift can help. "
A student from the Stanford University, 24, in a relationship for three years
 
10. A long relationship also needs a variety

"What has made me have a happy relationship for so long is that we treat each other with love and respect every day. (We at least try :-)) We are both willing to compromise. Otherwise, a relationship wouldn't work. We're both interested in keeping the relationship going because we realized that we were just a good fit.

Besides, we do not lie on the lazy side. I invest a lot in this relationship, and in that sense, I also expect to get it back. It should be a give and take. What helps to find each other again after an argument is some distance, even if it's only a few minutes. A little self-reflection can also help: What is the other trying to explain to me? Then you should work on problems and try to find a solution.

You may not find the right compromise for every problem, but it may still be worth trying. For a relationship to work well and for a long time, you need variety in everyday life. It sounds simple at first, but a short visit to a restaurant can help you be in a better mood. "
A mother of four, 35, married for 10 years










0 Comments

The Power of Loving Yourself

6/18/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
When we think of love, we often think of fiery romances and passion, but that's not love. Love is genuinely knowing someone and accepting them despite their flaws. Love is treating your partner with respect and dignity. Love is mutually supporting one another's goals.

Well, love doesn't stop with your partner. Those same behaviors that come with loving another are imperative when it comes to loving yourself. I want to help you with this sometimes difficult path to self-love. When you love yourself, the world is a brand new place. You start each day in a better place. You start treating yourself better. Every aspect of your life will improve. 

The first step to loving yourself is simply being kind to yourself. I know you're thinking it's easier said than done, but it's true. You wouldn't make friends with someone who was always saying awful things about you, would you?

Then why do you allow it from yourself?

Be Nice To Yourself 

As children, we chanted it. "Sticks and stones will break my bones. But words will never hurt me." We were wrong. Words can be damaging. They can decimate relationships and destroy self-confidence. They can bully, and they can demean. However, if used correctly, words can also inspire, uplift, and encourage. While it is important we say the right words to those we care about; it is even more vital that we choose the right words we are saying to ourselves. These words become our truths. They impact how we see ourselves and, in turn, how we project ourselves out into the world. 

If you've ever thought negative thoughts about yourself, if you've ever run yourself down over mistakes you've made, if you've ever just been outright mean to yourself, let's take the first steps to change that today. It doesn't come easily, nor does it always come naturally, but if you are willing to do the work, you will see amazing results in all facets of your life.

If you've looked into self-help, I'm sure you've come across words of affirmation. Even if they sounded cheesy, don't brush them off just yet. Studies have shown these positive declarations open people up to a higher possibility of behavioral change. They also decrease stress and increase overall well being.

For an affirmation to be effective, it needs to be positive, and it needs to be current. It is crucial not to choose a statement such as "I am not a bad person." Your mind always hones in on the negatives. You will be repeating "bad person," and it will stick. Instead, choose "I am a good person!" Note how I kept it current. Choosing "I will be a good person" will only reiterate to yourself that you are not there yet! But you are! Own your words and rewire that brain!

For the most powerful results, it is best to focus on one affirmation at a time and truly commit to it. You are just starting out, and there is no need to overwhelm yourself just yet. Use the words as your new mantra. Speak the words to yourself as you get ready in the morning, on your commute, or when you need a pick me up. 

Do you feel silly talking to yourself? Not all affirmations need to be spoken aloud. Some people work better with the written word. That's an entirely acceptable approach to this exercise. Keep a gratitude journal. Write down your affirmations. It doesn't matter how you're getting them out of your head and into the world; it only matters that you are getting them out there.

Our brains are designed with the ability to change. When you use your positive statements, you begin that rewiring process. You will start to alter your passive thoughts away from the negatives, and you will be amazed at how your outlook starts to change.


Picture
The Results

This path to self-love will completely alter your life. You will begin to see things in a different light, starting with yourself. Your health will start to improve. When you love yourself, you care about your body. You want it to keep going to support you through all stages of your life. I just know you'll start feeling better from the inside out.

Relationships with others only become better when the relationship with yourself grows. No longer are you riddled with self-doubt and low self-esteem. Instead, you are confident and ready to make that new friend. You are more willing to put yourself out into the world when you love the skin that you are in. 

And, when you put yourself out into the world, there are opportunities aplenty. Your motivation will begin running high, and the drive to succeed is immense. There is nothing you can't do! With all of this confidence, you are sure to take on that next promotion at work with ease. Or perhaps make that leap to starting your own business. Whatever you want, it's suddenly in the cards for you.

Maybe the most satisfying part of self-love is the freedom you will feel. When you genuinely love yourself, the expectations others hold for you are irrelevant. You already know who you are and what you want. The immense feeling of just being yourself is incredibility freeing. You are free to get out there and take on the world.

What's the first thing you're going to tackle? You are capable of all of it.


0 Comments

Leveraging Positive Thinking to Become A Happier Person

5/18/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
Did you know that a regular stream of negative thinking can actually change your brain and increase the likelihood of developing mental disorders, such as depression, anxiety, and can even hurt your memory? This is because when you always see the downside to situations, your brain becomes sapped with negative chemicals, such as monoamine oxidase A and cortisol, that leads to lower brain function abilities and/or activating the fight or flight responses.

With this reality, it only stands to reason that, alternatively, thinking positively can alter your life for the better and allow you to function at peak capacity. You are in control of our own happiness, and because of that reason, you should fight to make sure you are able to reach the highest levels of self-satisfaction that you possibly can. The best way to start that process is by training your brain to think more positively.

The Link Between Positive Thinking and Happiness

It is no secret that happier people tend to be more positive. But the real question is why that is the case. The reason behind this is because our thoughts are the pinnacle of our character. It is how we operate within the world and, in a sense, what we think is what we become. Our inner thoughts will reflect on our decisions and help guide us in the way we think about them.

When you practice seeing the positive side of life, your brain releases chemicals, such as dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins, which are the four primary chemicals that affect your happiness. These "feel good" chemicals help you become optimistic and think happy thoughts. You will become more focused and ultimately grow as a person because you will have the confidence to tap into your true potential.

Training Your Brain to Be Positive

If you are ready to lead a happy, rich, and fulfilled life, then you are already halfway there by deciding to become a better person to yourself. But that is only part of the battle. Because altering your mind and forming new, healthy habits is challenging, here are some helpful ways you can train your brain to be positive so you can reach your goals.

  • Observe Your Thoughts: This does not have to be a long practice, but a solid 5-10 minutes will do the trick. Watch how, why, and when your negative thoughts creep in. Once you can pinpoint the core reason and find patterns, you can then have a great starting point to find healthier, more favorable solutions to deter those unwanted thoughts.

  • Practice Positive Affirmations: Try telling yourself something positive every day, such as "I deserve to be happy." You can also scan for 3-5 positive things each day that you experience and bring them to light to relinquish. Remember, it does not have to be anything huge. It can be things like remembering how you paid a compliment or the beautiful sunset you got to see.

  • Get Rid of Toxicity: Whether it be people, bad habits, or a negative environment, get rid of anything in your life that is not serving you well. When you surround yourself with positivity, you are much more likely to become that way too.

  • Help Others: The satisfaction of being kind and helping others is another way to see the brightness of life. It can be as simple as holding a door open for someone or buying a stranger their morning coffee. This will train your mind to enjoy the little things and feel good about being a positive influence in society.
 
  • Self-Care: By taking care of your mind and body, such as eating healthy, exercising, and doing the hobbies you love are all ways that will leverage you to become more positive, in turn becoming happier. The focus on yourself and mindfulness while taking care of your own needs is the best way for you to stay balanced and in the right frame of mind.

Conclusion

It is clear that thinking in a more positive way will create positive results within your life, especially when it involves your overall happiness. A positive mindset and happiness go hand in hand and together can unlock a much better quality of life. The building of positive thinking will become a catalyst for you to redirect your emotions and thoughts in all areas of your life that contribute to your well being. It may not be an easy route to take to alter your mindset, but with a bit of practice and allowing yourself to see the good in life, you are inevitably giving yourself the best probability to obtain the optimal happiness that you deserve.








0 Comments

How Positive Thinking Can Make You Happier

2/14/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
The power of positive thinking is something quite remarkable. The act of practicing and illuminating positivity can bring so much happiness to both you and the people around you, which is certainly something to be admired. Because happiness is a choice, when you proactively choose to be happy and see the positive side of things, you are actually training your brain to release endorphins, which are those feel-good hormones. If this concept is new to you, then it can be challenging at first to get rid of those pesky negative thoughts that have resided in your head for so long. However, it is never too late to commit to yourself and change your life for the better to become happier and healthier.

Get Rid of the Negativity 
Being negative has detrimental effects on your body, both mentally and physically. In fact, research has shown that chronic negative emotions trigger your brain to perform specific actions, such as not partaking in activities you enjoy, which can hinder your true potential. This way of thinking narrows your focus and thoughts and leaves you dwelling on them rather than trying to find alternative solutions to solve it. By knowing this, it is clear that negativity is bad for your overall wellbeing, and also extremely difficult to break out of.

If you have decided that you want to have a happier life, then you have already won half the battle by understanding that you have the ultimate say in how you can live. When you have a mission to become happy and more positive, then negativity should have no place in your mind anymore. Filter out those toxic traits and replace them with healthier ways of thinking that can lead to a more optimistic outlook. 

How Positivity Makes You Happier

Studies have shown that when people are actively practicing positive thinking methods, they elude a more upbeat attitude. When you develop positive thought habits, you will be effectively allowing your brain to operate at an optimal level with free-flowing endorphins that will make you feel light and at peace with yourself. This will sway away any negative thoughts, self-doubts, and self-limiting beliefs that could stunt your happiness journey. In the end, you will feel much more confident and have ample amounts of motivation to experience new things and step out of your comfort zone to reach your full potential. 

Training Your Mind to Be Positive

It is certainly easy to be happy and cheerful when everything is going according to plan.  However, the real test lies when you are faced with unexpected setbacks and difficulties. In order to ensure that you can confront these situations in the most optimistic way as possible, then you must train your mind to think that way continuously.
  • Assume the Best Intentions – When you are going about your day, assume that everyone you see, both friends and strangers, are happy, honest and overall decent people doing the best they can. Finding the good in people can promote much happier interactions and influence positivity. 
 
  • Look on the Bright Side – Despite what could go wrong, always look towards the positive things. In almost all cases, the good things in your life will outshine the bad and make you realize that you can handle anything life throws at you with a smile on your face. 
 
  • Be Ratio Conscious – Never let negativity overpower you. Too many negative thoughts can make your brain respond with stress and sadness. Be aware of your mindset and always make certain that your positivity ratio is high because increased levels will trigger relaxation and boost happiness.
 
  • Smile More – Since your brain does not know the difference between a fake smile and a real one, it will release endorphins regardless if it is genuine or not. By smiling throughout the day, you will promote happiness and feel much more positive.

Conclusion

With life being so fleeting, everyone should strive to be as happy as they can be. Your mind is the key to your own happiness, and it starts by making the conscious decision to become more positive and practice positive thinking habits. Take control of your thoughts and really focus on things that make you happy and silence the negative voices when they try to creep into your mind. With diligence and working on improving your outlook on life, it will manifest into you obtaining an overall positive attitude, which will lead you to a much more fulfilled and happy life.

0 Comments

How Smiling More Can Increase Your Happiness

12/10/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture
You have most likely heard the saying of how happy people tend to smile more. Even though this seems like an obvious statement, there have been numerous studies conducted proving that there are true scientific reasoning's supporting this claim. With the backing of science, we are able to safely say that even though smiling is such a simple act, it contains tremendous benefits to overall well-being and happiness. 

You may be wondering how it is even possible that smiling can lead to happier lives.  It seems a bit backwards, since the majority of the time people smile because they are happy, not the other way around. Let’s take a closer look on how this form of expression holds the secret to becoming happier. 

How Smiling Effects Your Brain

Believe it or not, smiling can actually trick your brain into becoming happy. The very act of smiling makes your brain think that there is something positive going on or something funny is happening. The reason for this is that when you smile, you release certain hormones such as dopamine and serotonin which create an extremely powerful chemical reaction in your brain that results in you feeling cheerier. Dopamine is what increases our feelings of happiness and serotonin is directly linked with stress reduction.  Your brain does not care whether you are fake smiling or if it is genuine; it will still release those feel-good chemicals. 

Tips on How to Smile More 

You do not need any tips or practice on how to smile when something naturally funny or enjoyable happens to you. This section is dedicated in guiding you on how to remember to smile for those boring and mundane situations when you typically would not be smiling.

  • Smile Cues - Create some way for you to remember to smile during the day, especially if you are new to smiling for no particular reason. This could be something very simple, such as every time you hear your email or phone notification sound, you smile.  Another popular way is by actions. For example, every time you drink coffee or get in and out of your car, you will know it is smile time.  
  • Actually Try - Even if your smile is not caused by anything, actively try to make it as genuine and positive as possible.  The warmer and sincerer you make it the better your brain will react to it.   
  • Set Reminders - Use sticky notes, phone reminders or come up with your own unique way for you to remember to smile. Make sure you put these little things in places you know you will look, like a bathroom mirror or your computer screen. 

Time to Smile!

I know how hard it can be to be smiling and cheery all the time, especially if it is forced. However, by proactively making it a priority in your life, you will find that your entire well-being will benefit from it. The very act of smiling alone can lift your mood, lower your stress levels and even boost your immune system. No matter what you are doing during your busy days, try to smile more in order to become a happier person. It really is that simple.


0 Comments

Walking Away from Negativity

11/25/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture



  
​It is no secret that energy is everywhere, both positive and negative. It influences our daily lives from who we are associated with to what we read, watch and listen to. In a perfect world, everyone would be happy, but that is sadly not the typical case in today’s stressful society. Some people may feel trapped with their negative thoughts, like this is the only way they know how to think and react to situations.  But that is far from the truth. Anyone can walk away from negatively with a bit of desire, willpower and determination. If you want it bad enough, you will find a way to achieve it.

Negative thinking is not just being a Debbie Downer.  It can actually harm you in more than one way. This way of thinking is very unhealthy both mentally and physically. For example, reoccurring unhappiness and the feeling of hopelessness can lead to chronic stress. Stress is known for causing high blood pressure, immune system issues, hormone imbalances and depleting your brain of chemicals used for feeling happy. Not to mention, chronic stress can actually lower a person’s lifespan.

In addition to the personal bad side effects, negativity can actually harm other people. Ways of thinking and outlooks on life are highly contagious amongst the people you hang around with. If you are the negative person in the group, it could rub off onto others and vice versa. These facts alone should motivate you to want to walk away from negativity. If you are a negative person who wants to change for the better, here are some ways to lead a more positive life and gain the benefits of walking away from that toxic mindset. 

Stay Away from Negative Influences

You cannot thrive and change if your environment is holding you back. The people you associate with and the environment you are in can drastically influence your overall perceptions of the world. It can be easy to fall into a negative space, especially if everything around you is wired that way. As mentioned before, negative and positive outlooks on life have been considered contagious emotions. It is very easy to adapt to the people you hang out with and the environment you live in. The more negatively you are around, the more likely it will be that you will be pessimistic. This is why in order to get rid of negativity in your life, cleaning up your surroundings and getting rid of toxic things (like music, movies or books) and people who will bring you down is essential to becoming a more positive person overall.  

Practice Gratitude 

Practicing gratitude is a key ingredient for combating negativity. Being able to acknowledge and appreciate the good aspects of life is extremely powerful for overall emotional wellbeing. Sometimes the negative thoughts can take over, making it hard to see any good in your life.  But if you can find the bad, you can surely find the good as well. For every negative thought you think, actively search for three positive things in your life. You can rehearse this in your mind, but it may be more helpful to write it down on paper so you can have a visual representation to review. This practice helps people become much more thankful, motivated and happier with life.  

Practice Forgiveness  

One of the traits that negative people have is holding onto grudges. They hold onto something and do not let it go, which feeds their negative mindset. Grudges do nothing but cause stress and unnecessary negativity. If someone did something to you that upsets you, the best thing to do is forgive them. Forgiveness does not mean you agree with their actions or want to be best friends again.  It simply means that you forgive them because it lifts that anger and/or sadness from you and allows you to move on with your life. Forgiveness has also been linked to lowered blood sugar and improved immune functions. Being able to accept situations and circumstances for what they are and move on instead of dwell is a great step in walking away from negativity and live a healthier life.  

Laugh and Smile More

Laughing and smiling have been considered the best medicine. Doing this tends to lighten the mood during hard situations. When you smile and laugh, especially at yourself, is can cause physiological changes which help improve your mood and increase positive energy. This is a way of taking live a little less seriously and realizing that you are only human and mistakes happen. Life can be stressful and hectic, but laughing it off and making sure to actively smile through it all combats the negative emotions that could arise. 

Picture Yourself Walking Away 

This is where your imagination comes into play. It may sound silly, but actually picturing yourself walking away from your old self and ways of thinking is very effective and enlightening. Visualizing yourself leaving all that negativity behind and move forward can be very helpful for personal growth.  Sometimes people do this during meditation or during personal therapy sessions. But feel free to do this at your own time in your own comfortable space. Just make sure that there are no distractions so you can absorb the full experience and feel completely refreshed when you are done. This technique may not be for everyone, but it is a great way to feel more powerful and in control of your emotions.

Anyone can be positive, just like anyone can be negative.  Both take the same amount of energy, so why not choose the option that is the most beneficial for you and others around you? If you are so ingrained to a negative way of thinking, there is still hope for change. It may not happen overnight.  It will take time to train your brain to become more positive and leave negatively behind. Remember, bad things in life will happen. It is how you decide to face and tackle them that matter the most.  




0 Comments

What do you focus on?

11/13/2019

0 Comments

 
0 Comments

Positive Thinking

11/5/2019

0 Comments

 
I'm starting to do more video blogging so in this video I talk about positive thinking.
0 Comments
<<Previous

    Author

    I'm a life coach in California. Contact me if you have any questions.

    Archives

    September 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    August 2019
    May 2019
    January 2019
    November 2018
    September 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Home

Personal Coaching

Business Coaching

Contact

TONYPALERMOLIFECOACHING © 2020
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Events
    • Future Events
    • Past Events
  • Testimonial
  • Work with Tony
    • Personal coaching
    • Business Coaching
  • Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life
  • Join my email list
  • Contact