Sometimes, when people think in a negative way long enough, they become not as happy as they could be. In this article, I will discuss simple things we can do to become happier in our lives.
First, evaluate your life and ask yourself if you are a negative person. When I say negative person, I’m referring to talking badly about yourself or putting yourself down or using negative self-talk. For example, if I were to say, “I hate my job” or “I hate my life” that’s very negative, and it will bring down most people over time because it’s negative self-talk. Even saying, “I can’t find a partner” or “no one will date me” is very negative, and it’s a form of putting yourself down.
Sometimes, this first step is the hardest for people. We don’t think of ourselves as being negative, but in reality, we are. We all must take a hard look and think about this and be honest with ourselves. I fully admit that, sometimes, I catch myself being negative. When I catch myself doing this, I change my thinking because I know being positive will make me feel better about myself and just better in general.
For example, when I used to put myself down a lot of the time, I would feel very bad about myself. For example, I could not do anything right because I could not finish school or I could not find a partner in life. This was negative thinking or negative self-talk, and I started to believe what I was saying to myself. The fastest way to change one’s thinking is to say, “I no longer need those thoughts.”
Changing our negative thinking to positive thinking is a quick way to change our thinking and get ourselves to feel better about ourselves. If I say, “I can’t find someone to date,” which is negative, I would change this to, “Yes, I have a great new relationship and we love each other very much.” Or “I can’t find a job I really love” into “Yes, I have a great job that I love, and I get paid a great wage.”
Can you see how changing our negative sayings into positive sayings can help change our lives? If you change your negative thinking into positive thinking, your whole life will change. It will not change overnight. Sometimes, we want instant results, but I tell people, if you have been thinking in a negative way for months or years, it might take a few months to start thinking and feeling good about yourself. Look for small changes, and behind small changes will come big changes. Just don’t give up before you start to see a change.
From my experience, when I was thinking negatively, it took me about 90 days or a bit longer to start feeling a difference when I started thinking positively. But now, when I find myself thinking in a negative way, I can change my feelings very quickly into positive feelings because I’ve been thinking and being positive for so long. With anything, it takes time to change the way we are thinking and our self-talk. The important thing is we don’t give up, and we keep moving forward.
It’s normal to feel like nothing is changing when you start. This is the first test for you; if you keep thinking in a more positive way, you will get positive results. If you just give up, you will go back to thinking in a negative way, and you won’t change your life. You must be willing to let go of all your fears and just say, “I’m doing this, and I know it won’t be easy, but I’m doing this.” Even if you don’t see any results for a few months, it’s no reason to give up. It just means that you have been thinking in a negative way for so long that it will take you longer to change your thinking to become more positive.
Remember, you can do anything in this world if you think you can. Changing your negative thinking to positive thinking will get you positive results. Your whole life will begin to change by just changing your thoughts.
Our minds are the most powerful thing in this universe. If we think in a certain way, we will manifest what we are thinking about. Our thoughts can change our lives. We can manifest anything in this universe we desire. The main reason people don’t think this will work is they give up on manifestation before they actually manifest anything. The one thing about manifesting that I’ve learned over the years is it takes time to manifest. Things don’t just come into our lives the next day; sometimes, it takes months to manifest into our lives.
How to use our minds to manifest, that’s the question I’m sure everyone is thinking. Here are five steps to manifest.
1. Get clear on what you want to manifest into your life.
2. Say and write your affirmation every day to help bring what you want to manifest into your life.
3. Believe what you want will come into your life. Use your imagination to believe it will happen.
4. Be thankful for what you have right now.
5. Never give up.
Now, let’s look at each step to manifest your heart’s desire. Step one, get clear on what you want to manifest into your life. This step is easy. Whatever you want to manifest into your life, just think about it and pick something. For this example, let’s say we want to manifest a new career. So many people are in jobs they hate that this will make a great example.
Step two, say and write the affirmation that will lead you to manifest what you want. So, think about what you want; in this example, we want a new career, so a great affirmation would be, “Yes, I have a great new career that I love. I work with great new co-workers, and I make a great living.” This is an easy and basic affirmation, but it will manifest a great new career into our lives.
Now that we have the affirmation, you can say this affirmation all the time. Write it out and say it. Doing both things will give the affirmation more energy. When I was starting as a life coach, I would say all the time, “Yes, I am a successful life coach. I am a successful life coach.” It’s the same principle for a new career; if you say this affirmation all the time, you will manifest it. You must not give up. Giving up is not an option. Write out the affirmation and put it on your mirror in your bathroom, so when brushing your teeth, you will see it and say it. Say it all the time out loud or just in your mind.
Step three, while you are saying your affirmation, believe you will manifest the new career into your life. Believe it to be true. Use your imagination to believe it has happened. For this, envision yourself with your new career. You walk into a new building, and you sit down at your new desk. You see yourself in this new office, working alongside new co-workers. You feel wonderful, and you feel happy that you have this new career.
You are using your imagination to envision your new career at the same time as saying your affirmation. This will bring more energy to your affirmation when you use your imagination. You must believe your affirmation can manifest it into your life.
Next is being thankful for what you have in your life right now. You might not like the job you have right now but be thankful for it. Try to remember that someone else might be happy with the job you have. I know it’s hard to be happy when you don’t like the job you’re in but try to remember being happy and thankful will bring more great things into your life.
The last step is never give up on your affirmation. People will often give up way too soon before they have even given the affirmation a chance. Please remember it might take months to manifest what you desire. I remember my own experience with my health. I was feeling sad and depressed; it took around two to three months for me to feel better in my own life. Ten years before this, I had tried affirmations but gave it only like a week or two to manifest perfect health in my life. I got no results because I gave up too soon. After I worked with my life coach, he told me, Tony, you must say your affirmations repeatedly until you are sick and tired of saying them.
That’s what I did; I said them until I was tired of saying them. I keep saying them repeatedly. After two to three months, I felt better, and I knew right then that affirmations work if I give it enough time to work. I relate it to a cruise ship; a cruise ship can’t turn sharp if they want to go in a different direction. That cruise ship might take a long time to change directions. It’s the same when doing affirmations. It takes a while before that affirmation comes true for you, but just like the cruise ship, it will happen if you don’t give up. Never give up. It will happen. It just might take longer than you thought it would.
Photo credit Pixabay
Guest post by Dana Brown
The New Year is Here!
And we couldn’t be more excited. There’s something about a new year that makes people want to give their life a little shot in the arm to make things better. We’re not just talking about resolutions-- once the craziness of the holidays has passed, people want to clean house, recharge, and make small changes in their lives to ensure a healthier and happier start to the new year.
Creating small, achievable milestones you can do every day helps build confidence and self-satisfaction. These little things you can do are enjoyable, so you don’t want to skip them. On the other hand, if you miss one or two days, it’s not the end of the world, either. While they may be little, they add up in a big way, improving your home and health. Eventually you stop thinking about them at all and they become second nature.
Create a Healthy Home
Your home should be a place where you can escape the stresses of the outside world so you can recharge-- and we don’t just mean your electronic devices. In fact, you should make it a goal to use your phone, tablet, and laptop less when you are there. Set aside a room in your home without electronic distractions for your creative pursuits. Buy a comfortable chair, some paintings of nature, and other relaxing decor to inspire less stress.
In addition to setting up space for your creative side, you should also have some options around the house to help improve your physical health. You don’t have to turn a spare bedroom into an entire home gym, but keeping some fitness equipment nearby gives you the opportunity to do a little physical activity in case you are feeling stressed or anxious. At the very least, having a yoga mat gives you a portable space where you can stretch and listen to your body.
Improve Your Diet
Instead of vowing to give up soft drinks or chips, incorporate more healthy options into your diet this year. It’s easier to say you are going to work on giving yourself more of something than cutting something out altogether.
To make 2018 your healthiest year yet, start small. Create a healthier and happier home where you can escape from stress by setting up an area where you can ignore electronic devices and instead pursue your creative side. It’s also a great idea to have some easy-to-use gym equipment you can use at home so you can always fit in a little extra activity to relieve stress. Instead of giving up things you love this year, make it a goal to incorporate more of the good stuff. Drink more water to improve your health and rev up your metabolism. Eat more superfoods to feel more satiated and nourished when you eat. Even little things like cooking your meals in a cast iron skillet can have a big impact on your mood and health. The little things are easier to stick with, but they add up for a huge impact on your overall wellness.
The law of attraction basically means, whatever you think about or talk about, you will get. If you think positively, you will get positive results. If you think negatively, you will get negative results. This is why I tell my clients always to think positively way, because thinking in a positive way will change your life for the better.
I’ve been asked a lot of questions about how to use the law of attraction to manifest and get what we really want. I will give you a few examples of how to use the law of attraction and manifest what you want in your life.
In this first example, let’s say you want to manifest a new relationship. You start by getting very clear about what you want. Let’s say I am a woman, 25 years old, who wants to manifest a great loving boyfriend. The first thing you must do is understand that you have to get ready for your perfect boyfriend. What do I mean by this? I mean, you must declutter your house. You must declutter your life.
First, clean out part of the closet for your boyfriend. This way, you are affirming to the universe you are ready for a relationship because you are making room for one. Continue with the rest of your house and make room for your relationship. Make room in your bathroom; sleep on one side of the bed, instead of the middle. If you have a two-car garage, clean out the garage and park on one side, instead of in the middle. These steps are confirming that you are ready for a relationship. You are affirming to the universe you are ready to accept a great relationship. You are getting your life in order for another person.
The next step is to say this affirmation, “Yes, I accept a great new relationship into my life. We get along great, and we love each other very much.” Keep saying this affirmation, and you will attract a great boyfriend into your life. Remember, when you keep saying an affirmation repeatedly, you will attract that affirmation into your life.
It might take 90 days for you to attract what you are looking for, so I always tell clients never give up. After the 90 days, you might not get the perfect man, but you might attract more dates, leading to the perfect man of your dreams. My point is never give up. People often give up before they attract what they want because they give up too soon. Affirmations work, but they take time.
Another step I have learned that will help you attract your affirmation to you faster is to put the word “Yes” in front of all your affirmations. For example, if I said, “I have a great new boyfriend,” instead I would say, “Yes, I have a great new boyfriend.” See the difference? It adds more energy to the affirmation. This will help bring the thing you request to you faster.
Next, let’s look at an affirmation for a new job. A great affirmation for a new job would be, “Yes, I have a great new career that I love, and I get paid a great wage for doing it.” This would attract a great new career into your life. Say this affirmation all the time to attract a new career into your life.
No matter what you are trying to attract into your life, you can use your imagination to help manifest your desires faster. To use your imagination, envision what you are saying in your affirmations as if you already have it. So, if you are trying to affirm a new career, envision yourself going into a new building and working with new co-workers. If you are trying to affirm a new boyfriend, envision yourself going out on dates, going to the movies, doing things together, and coming home together. This way, you are saying the affirmations out loud, and you envision your affirmations in your mind. This will attract your affirmations to you faster.
One last tip, like I said above, no matter what, don’t give up. You can manifest anything you desire in your life, but you must not give up. You have to keep positive, and you must keep saying your affirmations. The best advice I ever got was to say affirmations until I am sick and tired of saying them. That’s what I am telling you; say your affirmations until you are sick and tired of saying them and then say them again. You can do anything if you just think you can.
My new book, Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life, is now available. I feel so blessed to have been able to share my experiences with everyone in this book. This article will explain why I wrote this book and how being more positive has helped me.
Sometimes, we all experience things that have a direct impact on how we feel. When I was around 20, I had a big breakup, and this made me feel low and depressed, which is very normal after a breakup, but for me, it lasted a long time. I could not figure out a way to move past it and move on. I almost felt stuck in one place, no matter what I did.
Moving along, years went by and my mood was like an up and down roller coaster. One day, I would be OK; the next I would have great sadness. I tried everything that people told me to try. I did talk therapy, and I talked my head off until I realized it was not helping all that much. I tried hypnosis, hypnotherapy, and medication. The medication and talk therapy helped a little bit but nothing got me to 100 percent. I just felt very sad some days, and I did not know why.
I met my life coach, and he taught me about affirmations and thinking positively. This was the key for me because I now realize I was feeling low because I was thinking negatively. I would wake up and just think I feel sad today, and I would create this in my life with my thoughts. Even if I wanted to be happy, I would just think of myself as being and feeling sad, so I did not have a chance to become happy because of my negative thinking. My life coach taught me to change my negative thinking to more positive thinking. This helped me so much in my life.
After I started thinking in a positive way and saying affirmations, I slowly started to feel better. I felt happy for more than a day or two at a time, which had not happened in years. I finally felt a sense of normalcy. Let me just say this did not happen overnight. So many people want an instant fix, and for me, it took months of thinking positively to change the way I was feeling. This was due to my thinking in such a negative way for so long that it took months to change the way I was thinking and feeling. The way I think of it is this; when a cruise ship wants to change direction, it can’t just change quickly. It takes a while for it to change directions. This is how it was for me. It took a long time for me to change the way I was thinking, but sometimes, good things in life take a while.
I’m telling you this because many people want an instant fix. This is not always possible because it takes time to change the way we think. When you start to think more positively, don’t worry when you go back to thinking negatively; just brush the negative thinking aside and say, “I no longer need those thoughts.” We all go back to the way we were thinking because we are so used to thinking that way. It might take a few months of thinking in a positive way to impact your life. The one thing I can tell you is never give up because, in time, you will change your thinking, and you will feel better.
In my book, Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life, I go into more detail about my situation and what I did to help myself. But for this article, I just want you to know that you can feel better, and you can change your life by changing your thoughts. You just can’t give up and say this is how it is and there is nothing more I can do. You can do something. You can change your thoughts, and you can change your life.
One thing I will say is, if you are feeling down or sad, ask for help. Talk with your doctor or a close friend and see if you can get help. I’m a firm believer that every type of medicine has a place in this world. Medication might help some people, while it might not help others, just as hypnosis or hypnotherapy or even thinking in a more positive way might not help everyone. But that’s why we have so many good choices in life. You can do anything if you think you can.
The best thing about doing affirmations and thinking more positively in your life is you can do it, even if you are doing other forms of therapy. Remember, a positive thought in your life will get you positive results if you don’t give up.
Life coach Tony Palermo’s new book shares the inspiring tale of rise from dark through “positive thinking’
California-based life coach Tony Palermo is about to release his new book that talks about changing the life for better even amidst challenges through the strength of positive mindset.
California, September 26, 2017: Life is a maze that often puts us into challenges and hard times. But the winner is the one knows how to never give up and successfully fight off those hurdles with optimism. In that light, leading California-based life coach Tony Palermo is soon to release his new book that shares the inspiring tale of rise from the dark times through the power of positive thinking. Aptly entitled as "Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life”, the book focuses on the real-life account of Tony’s own story of battling depression and overcoming depression with affirmations and positive thinking.
The book will be officially released on Amazon on September 29.
"Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life” portrays a motivating journey of Tony’s self-evolution from his grim phase to the spirited inspiring individual that he is today. In fact, he wrote this book to share with the world his motivation behind becoming a life coach.
“I am thrilled to announce the launch of my new book at the end of this month. It’s a real life account of my own story – my dark times when I was badly bogged down with depression and certainly my transformation into a happy enthusiastic individual that I am today. This book provides a roadmap to change your life for better. I am confident anybody looking forward to rising up in life would greatly benefit from this book.”
The author used to suffer from depression for the most of his adult life. He had looked for a cure but almost every time he had he ended up with no results. Then, suddenly he stumbled upon his life coach and decided to try life coaching to improve his life.
“It was one of the best decisions (working with a life coach) I ever made. My life coaching sessions introduced me to the powerful world of positive thinking, affirmations and I started feeling happier than I have ever felt in years. I realized it actually worked for me. It further inspired me to become a life coach and help other struggling souls to rise up counting on hope and positivity. My book echoes this same amazing philosophy of positive thinking in battling hard times in life. I want the world to know what affirmations are and how to channelize a positive mindset to transcend into a happier life- regardless of the adversities before you.”
About Tony Palermo- Tony Palermo is a certified life coach based in California. He offers both one-on-one personalized and business coaching sessions. His sessions can be taken up personally or through Skype or phone.
To know more about the book and Tony Palermo, visit https://www.tonypalermolifecoach.com
My new book "Positive Thoughts Will Change Your Life" is now available. Below are images of the front and back cover. I'd like to thank Gary Quinn for writing the foreward to the book. Thank you Lisa Kitter and Nancy Rarick for reviewing the book. You will be able to buy the new book in my store and on Amazon.
You can now order my book from Amazon.
When you say an affirmation like, “Yes, I am happy” or “Yes, I have a great new job,” this goes out into the universe and will come back to you. This is why, when you say an affirmation long enough, you can manifest it. It’s the law of attraction working in your life.
The law of attraction says, whatever you think about, you will attract it into your life. So, if you think of yourself as having a great, happy, and successful day, you will manifest it. If you think a positive thought over and over again, you will attract positive results. The same is true; if you think in a negative way, you will attract negative results. So, I tell all my clients to learn to think in a positive way to create the positive results you really want in your life.
This is why our thoughts are so important. When you use your time and energy to think in a positive way, instead of a negative way, we can change your life. Think of it this way; would you rather be around someone who is always positive or always negative? Negative people bring themselves and the people around them down. I don’t know about you, but I would much rather be around someone who is positive and happy in life. When I’m around someone like this, it almost rubs off on the people around them. We all feel happy and more positive.
If you are feeling like you are not the most positive person, the first thing to do is change your thinking. When you wake up, say, “Yes, I am happy and I am more positive.” This is a great affirmation to start changing your thinking and changing your attitude to be more positive.
Changing your attitude and thinking does not happen overnight. If you have been a negative person for a long time and say the affirmation, “Yes, I am happy and I am more positive,” you won’t wake up tomorrow and be a positive person. The change takes time, and it takes energy. A negative attitude will pop up occasionally, and the best thing to do is just say, “I no longer need that kind of negative thinking.” Accept it and move on. After you realize you are thinking in a negative way, say the positive affirmation again and again. It will take you around 30 days to change your attitude from negative to positive. It takes around 30 days to change anything for long-term success. Don’t beat yourself up if you start thinking in a more positive way and tomorrow you start thinking in a negative way, because it takes time to retrain your mind to think in a more positive way.
The one thing I tell every client I have is don’t give up. You will go back to thinking in a negative way because you are used to doing this. A negative attitude about life can’t be changed overnight. It can be changed, but it might take a few weeks.
This goes for anything in your life; if you want to go to bed an hour or two earlier every night, it will take a while before your body gets used to the new bedtime. The same is true for our thoughts. You start thinking in a positive way, but the negative thoughts or the negative attitude comes back. Brush it aside and keep saying your positive affirmations, and in time, you will become a more positive person. It won’t be easy, but good things are not always easy in life. Remember, more people will want to be around a positive person than a negative person.
Thoughts can change your life if you are willing to make the change. Change is not always easy or fun, but it will change your life for the better. Never give up and keep moving forward. You can do anything in this world if you just think you can.
Everything you think and say creates the life you have right now. If you think in a negative way long-term, you will create negative results. If you change your thoughts and think in a positive way, you can create positive results. It is true; your thoughts create your life. It does not matter if you think in a negative way or a positive way, you will get it. Think of it this way; when you think or say a thought, it goes out to the universe and comes back to you. The universe does not care if you think in a positive way or a negative way. It just comes back to you. This is why I tell everyone to think in a positive way.
The great thing about thoughts is we can change our thoughts. We can change the way we think. In these examples below, I will show you how to change your negative thoughts to positive thoughts. Remember you can do anything if you just think you can. Your thoughts are so much more powerful than anyone has ever told you.
Thinking in a negative way for a long time can make a person attract what they are thinking about. For example, let’s use a person who says, “I hate my life.” When a person says this over and over again, they will believe it to be true. Or a person might say, “I feel sad or depressed.” This will create feeling low or depressed in the person’s life. I try to get clients to understand that, even if you have been thinking in a negative way for a long time, you can change your thoughts to help create a new reality in your life.
With this being said, this is not something you can change overnight. Changing our thinking and our thoughts is easy to do, but it takes time to change your reality. The reality is, if you have been doing anything for a long time, it will take time for you to change the behavior. Thoughts can be changed quickly, but you will still think in a negative way. This is because you have been thinking in a negative way for so long that it’s very natural. I want you to give yourself enough time to change your thoughts.
It will be different for everyone on how much time it will take to change your thoughts. For me, it took a little over a month to notice a difference in my thinking. When I was feeling low, I would automatically think in a negative way. When I would wake up, I would think to myself what a crappy day, and I feel depressed. When I changed my thinking to be more positive, it was not overnight. I had this shift. It took a month to see small changes.
I am telling you this so, after a few weeks of you not noticing any difference in your life and your thinking, you won’t give up. Giving up is not an option. It takes time to change your life, and in the end, you will be a great, happy person because you did not give up.
Remember the affirmations above, “I hate my life” and “I feel sad or depressed” are examples of negative affirmations. These are just examples, but you have to change these negative affirmations to be more positive. I would say, “Yes, I feel happy and healthy” and “Yes, I love my life.” Can you see the difference? One is very negative, while the other affirmations are very positive. Saying these positive affirmations won’t change your life overnight. It might take a month or two to see little changes in your life. But you will see the changes and don’t give up. What I realized is people normally give up too quickly before they see any change. Or they give up when they see little changes because they want a big change. Don’t give up. Change happens, but it might be slow to start. Once you give up, you will basically have to start over. If you have been doing positive affirmations for a month and give up, it’s like you wasted a whole month of your life. You will then have to start over at day one. It’s very frustrating, I know, when you work at being positive and you see no results. You must keep going; you must not give up. Giving up is not an option. You can do anything in this world if you just think you can.
Once you make the choice to be positive, keep being positive for the rest of your life. Once you make that commitment, you will be happy with your life; just never give up.
I always tell people, if you are depressed, please ask for help. Go see your doctor and get checked. Sometimes, our thoughts can make us depressed; other times, it’s something else. I know, if serotonin levels are low in a person’s brain, it can make a person depressed. It’s always a good idea to get checked. There is nothing in the world wrong with asking for help.
I'm a life coach in California. Contact me if you have any questions.